Research has shown that the average guy will stop asking for sex or initiating it after as little as 3 rejections! That after 2 or 3 rejections a man begins to question his masculinity and rather than showing his desire for sexual connection will withdraw.
And most men will not reveal that to you. It’s too painful an admission!
So if the word NO is part of your relationship game play, I strongly advise you to rethink what you doing to the overall longevity and health of your relationship…and change your response to a YES and watch your relationship blossom.
And if you’re really committed to taking your relationship to the next level…rekindling the flame… Make the Seven Day Sex Challenge your starting block and enjoy the ride!
Kids in the Household
Got kids and say there’s no time?
Make it clear to the kids that kids’ time stops at a particular time, 8pm or 8.30pm or if they’re young even earlier…
Older kids? Make sure that all the homework requests are met by the required time, and let them know that from that time on… (Or whatever time works for you in your household) …That it’s parents’ time.
Or make the effort to wake a bit earlier…
Men’s testosterone levels are highest first thing in the morning making this the perfect time to connect sexually. Levels decrease as the day wears on!
What About Me?
I can hear some of you protesting that I may seem somewhat biased… seeming to present the male perspective with regards to meeting the sexual intimacy needs of a relationship.
And in response to that, perhaps some of you may be saying but what about me and my needs…?
Precisely! What about your needs? That’s exactly why you need to schedule in time for sex. As mentioned in an earlier post as women we need to be in the mood for sex to really enjoy it!
Men and Women’s Need for Sex Differs
Women need foreplay. And men with pent up testosterone swimming around in their bodies sometimes forget that their partner’s needs are different to theirs.
Schedule in time for sex and as a woman you’ll find when the time comes around you’ll certainly be in the mood for it!
Schedule in more frequent sex and as your partner’s innate need is to please you, your needs will be more than met! You’ll be smiling from ear to ear! I promise you…
So very succinctly take the novelty of the sex when you were dating and turn that into a dating schedule for sexual bliss.
Watch as the chemistry that you experienced in those first few years together turns into Alchemy…Much deeper and richer than anything that you have ever dreamed of…
Become open to saying YES! …More often… That’s the key to igniting loving connection…
A 30 Second Recipe to the Secrets of a Loving Relationship!
I recently met up with an old work colleague, someone I’ve kept in contact with despite our going in quite different career directions…
She had recently moved house, and the visit was as much a catch up as an opportunity to view the new house.
As we chatted in the kitchen, her partner of 8 years was buzzing downstairs…working on his antique car…a pet hobby.
He joined us when we were having coffee and when he did the conversation turned to the house and the plans to reinvigorate the garden which had been neglected for some time.
As the chat continued, I marvelled at the manner in which these two communicated. Each had very different ideas as to how the garden should be developed and each took care to ensure that the ideas of the other were being heard and appreciated.
Afterwards my friend and I went for a walk…and I commented on the exchange between her and her partner.
I was in the middle of writing my forthcoming book, ‘Why Do Men Stray?’ so I ventured to ask her what she thought were the secrets of a successful relationship…and particularly to her relationship… and I was quite surprised by her succinct response…
‘There are 3 ingredients to a successful relationship and that’s all.’ She said…
‘Learn to communicate openly –never go to bed on an argument.
Give your partner projects to do and openly appreciate his efforts.
And Say Yes to sex whether you feel in the mood or not… You’ll end up enjoying it when you least expect it and he’ll be happy…
At the time I laughed.
I‘d just written the first 15 chapters of my book ‘Why Do Men Stray?’ and what women need to do to keep the love in their life lasting and enduring and my colleague had summarized the essence of my message in 30 seconds or less.
She added, ‘You know I’m often not in the mood for sex, but I understand how important it is for him and usually I start off half-hearted… but boy I usually end up enjoying it and having a blast. So why miss the ride?’
She added…. ‘I learnt a lot in my first marriage. I was too focused on being right… and in the end the fun died.’
And just in case you’re wondering, this woman is no wall flower! She’s a very successful business woman, runs her own consultancy practice and is no shrinking violet when it comes to expressing her wants and needs. She’s a very powerful force in her own right!
So take heed!
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