How Do You Keep the Novelty & Fun Alive in Your Relationship?

Young couple doing salsa or latin american dancing togetherIn a recent post I discussed the importance of  consciously working on the relationship and like plants relationships need tendering to grow and reach their full potential. That if not cared for consciously, that lack of effort over time can create havoc on what was once a truly loving union.

Relationships need constant tendering to maintain the connection and deepen the intimacy…

… And that’s not always easy to do. So what are some things that you can do to keep the relationship alive and fresh and continually grow together?Continue Reading

Say No to Negativity & Criticism in Your Relationship & Watch Your Relationship Flourish

Youn couple having an argument Several posts ago I mentioned the importance of creating a negative free environment as a means for a relationship to develop and deepen in connection…

Agreeing to foster an environment with a zero tolerance for negativity or criticism is a powerful decision to make to ensure that your relationship has a solid foundation to grow and deepen in a very loving supportive manner. Continue Reading

Improve Your Communication Effectiveness – Use Active Listening, Questions & Heartfelt Words

Effective communication is foremost about improving your ability to listen. That is actively or empathetically listening to one another and responding accordingly.

Blue bird whispering into a woman's earLearning to listen actively or empathetically is an important skill in improving your communication effectiveness and something that I urge all couples to learn how to do.

Active or Empathetic Listening
So what is active or empathetic listening…? Active listening is when you listen attentively, fully engaged… And in so doing become cognizant not only of the other person’s language and choice of words… but on hearing those words rather than assuming that through your own filters of experience and perception you’ve received the message intended, check in with the sender of the message…empathetic to their choice of words.

…So using the sender’s key words check in … to see that you’ve interpreted or received the message correctly… that the message received is in fact, the message intended.

Why Listen Actively In This Way?
It’s so easy to assume that we’ve heard what was intended and understand the message that was sent… Sadly this is rarely the case.

Actively or empathetic listening is a means of eliminating or reducing potential misinterpretations or misleading exchanges… because you’re checking in with the other person, the sender, clarifying that you’ve received the intended message.

It’s important to remember that we all use words differently, and while the words themselves may seem important… because we use that differently it’s very easy to misinterpret what the sender intended with those words.Continue Reading

Spice up Your Relationship with these Simple & Fun, Conscious Connection Practices

Young lovers walking down the streetIn an earlier post I outlined the role Dopamine and Serotonin play in experiencing the feelings of closeness and connection in the early phases of love. In that post I explained that it’s the presence of these love hormones that are responsible for how we feel, that ‘blinded in love’ feeling.

After this initial phase, there are two other hormones that are responsible for the love and connection experienced in the early years of partnership, Vasopressin, and Oxytocin. These two hormones are largely present in the early years, and remain so with couples who experience a healthy and satisfying sex life.Continue Reading

The Power of Loving Touch to Enhance & Deepen Intimacy & Connection in Any Relationship…

To Touch is to Give Life’  Michelangelo

Young couple at the pool connecting with loving touchLast week I was sitting outside at a favourite café having lunch when a young couple sat down at a table next to me. Now this café is very small – with only 6 tables outside so it’s very easy to notice what other diners are doing and how they are interacting with one another. One of the things I love about this café is that in being so small it’s quite an intimate affair. Most of the diners are regulars… known to the waiters by name. And being in a location that doesn’t attract a lot of passing traffic it’s frequented primarily by locals.Continue Reading

Plan! Create Great Passionate Date Nights that Keep the Sizzle & Love Alive!

Young couple in a restaurant enjoying themselvesWant to keep your relationship alive and passionate? Easy! Great, Passionate Date Nights!

If you’ve been reading my posts you’ll be aware that I am a great advocate for date nights irrespective of how long you and your partner have been together. By that I mean scheduling in quality time for you and your partner or spouse to spend quality time together on a regular basis.

In one of my recent posts I stressed the importance of these dates being placed into your calendar so that they happen –and just to be clear these are times when you and your partner (so no kids or close friends) spend quality time together actively enjoying one another’s company and sharing quality time together– just as you did in the early days of dating.Continue Reading

The Power of a Hug! Lift your Spirit & Ignite Connection! Hug with Passion Every Day!

the power of a hugLast holiday season I awoke to a rainy wet Sunday morning. With no family around I had decided the night before that I was going to treat myself to a date with myself –lunch then a movie. With that in mind I drove to my nearest cinema complex to find that it was closed. The movie was advertised to start at 2pm and I had wanted to purchase a ticket prior to settling down to eat.

The cinema complex had just been renovated and in doing so had installed an allocated seating system – which did not please me! (Previously one could purchase a ticket and sit anywhere, which meant I could arrive 15 minutes before the theatre was open. With the new allocated seating the staff were determining where I sat – and despite my best attempts to explain my preferences I was never in my preferred section – seems everyone bar me likes to sit in the centre!) So my early arrival was an attempt to obtain a seat of my preference!Continue Reading

Want a Healthy, Deeply, Loving Relationship? – Easy! Focus on One Conversation at a Time!

Couple sitting on couch discussing something important Yesterday I found myself sitting outside on a terrace enjoying the sun – the heat and feel of summer in the air. I was at a local Italian restaurant, seated outside on the terrace which is elevated from the street below- and so overlooks the busy street below. I was on my own, having lunch, prior to going to a movie- something I love to do on a Sunday afternoon. And as I waited for my order I decided to spend the time making a few notes on articles that I wanted to write.

The week had been a busy one and I had not had time to write my usual number of posts. So this seemed a good time to jot down some of the many ideas that were swimming around in my head. The restaurant was very busy. All the tables were full. I took out my notepad and took a sip of wine, and as I did I reminded myself of how fortunate I am. Just to be able to sit here on a sunny afternoon, enjoying a cool glass of wine and letting the world slip by.Continue Reading