So what’s important?… it’s important to maintain it, nurture it, and keep it in tip top condition so that you create and have the relationship of your dreams…The relationship that you deserve… Keeping the love tank full and never lifting your eyes from the road you’re on and the destination you both want to reach.
It’s the everyday experiences of your relationship together that is fundamental to its overall success. Given that it’s important to make every day count towards its success, and to take well-earned breaks or respites along the way to refresh, celebrate and rejuvenate…
And with each milestone reached along the way remember to have fun!
So put your foot on the accelerator, fill up your love tank and be prepared to take the ride of your life…
Relationships Need Nurturing
Think of your relationship as you would a plant… a seedling that you’re nurturing to grow to maturity.
What are all the ingredients that contribute to that seedling developing into a tall, fully, mature plant, first gingerly taking root and then gaining in height and strength… and in its growth and development giving pleasure to all?
If an acorn can grow into a huge, splendid tree providing shade and beauty to all that behold it, what are the possibilities for a relationship – to grow, blossom and radiate meaningful and everlasting love?
But the acorn doesn’t grow simply by being put in the ground. As a seedling it needs nurturing, warmth and water, and the right nutrients to sprout.
The right nutrients to enable it to grow… Water and fertilizers, either from its surroundings or consciously added by man… and an environment that fosters growth… warmth and encouragement and plenty of sun!
How Robust is Your Relationship?
In the early stages of its growth the acorn is highly vulnerable to the ravages of the elements. Intense heat or violent storms can wreak havoc to what might seem the strongest of seeds or saplings.
Intense heat can leave its leaves scorched by the sun and storms can rip its very roots from the ground itself.
See any similarities with the growth of this tree and the growth in your relationship?
Both need to be nurtured, protected and loved…
Harsh environments wreak the most havoc on both relationships and sapling trees.
The shade and beauty of each is only really appreciated when both have withstood the elements and learnt to withstand the storms.
And with conscious effort and conscious loving this can be achieved easily. It merely requires time and commitment.
Yes relationships develop over time and with conscious commitment and devotion flourish…
Sadly I often hear couples say that in the busyness of life – there is no time for conscious effort or worse… reject the notion that their relationship requires conscious nurturing or effort… I’ve also witnessed relationships that exist in what I term unsafe environments where arguing in the home is rife and one or both partners consider negative and derisive comments to one another to be acceptable or appropriate loving behavior.
None of these patterns or excuses is acceptable and if deemed acceptable… long term… lead to relationships that drift apart.
NO Excuses Acceptable
So be brutally honest with yourself…Don’t make excuses or say ‘You’re too busy’ …Or ‘There’s no time’…
All too often I have seen a relationship fail… as one or both parties failed to appreciate the need to put in conscious effort… And consciously fail to fertilize the relationship.
Couples then separate… and seek love elsewhere…
Relationships Need Conscious Effort
And yeah and behold… in the newness of the next relationship… a new relationship… conscious consideration and effort dominant the relationship… exist in abundance!
Talk of this latest love…focusses entirely on the conscious effort that’s being put into developing the new and fledging relationship…the time and conscious effort that’s being given to the new love…and how much fun is being had…
Yet that same person failed to pay attention to the relationship that they had…and lost. Familiar story?
So take a moment to reflect… How important is your relationship to you? And if you were to lose your current relationship… what would you be prepared to do for the next one? How much time would you be prepared to give to another… a new and fledging relationship…? Then ask yourself, are you giving your current relationship the attention and conscious effort that it deserves?
An interesting perspective to contemplate isn’t it?
Space to Grow
So remind yourself each day of how precious your relationship is, and in doing so ask yourself what conscious effort do you or can you make each day to enable your relationship to sparkle and grow?
I’m also a great believer that relationships benefit greatly by exploring ways in which you as a couple can grow and develop together… And in addition to this… provide space, support and encouragement for each individual within the relationship to develop and grow.
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Many thanks and much love…