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How do You Create Intimacy When Your Relationship Seems to be on Rocky Ground?

Couple in bed, man sleeping woman looking at him feeling very frustratedIn several recent posts I have discussed how intimacy develops over time. And that the important ingredients for its foundation are honesty and openness – building a firm foundation of trust in one another.  That’s sounds easy but what if your relationship is on somewhat rocky ground? And what I’m talking about feels way out of your comfort zone…?

The first thing to ask yourself is ‘What happened?’ Where did things go awry? And why…?’Continue Reading

Become a Tiger in the Bedroom, Initiate Sex like A Temptress & have Your Partner Purring for More

Woman standing on the bed, tempting her partner Many of my clients who enjoy an active, delicious sex life feel that there’s an imbalance in the status quo. They feel that sex only happens when their husband or significant other initiates it.

These same women are surprised and respond in disbelief when I advise them that men love it when their partner initiates sex…

All too often I hear them say…’I’ve tried on numerous occasions and it just doesn’t happen!’Continue Reading

How to Keep the Sizzle & Sexual Intimacy in Your Relationship Alive…& Deliciously Playful

Couple making love in bed

Image by imagerymagestic courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

I’ve written several times on the importance of keeping the sexual intimacy in a relationship alive.  And have stressed many times that when the sexual intimacy in a relationship begins to fade or lose its attraction a relationship is entering troubled waters.

So don’t let this happen to you… Sexual intimacy is critical in a loving, healthy relationship. And it’s one that I suggest you, the female in the relationship, take responsibility for… to ensure that this part of the relationship remains alive and fun.Continue Reading

How to Share & Have Fun with Your Partner When the Activity Isn’t One You’re Fond Of …

Two colourful bikes outside a building Ever been on a date or an outing that your partner thought was so much fun and you did not? Or participated in an activity that to your partner was full of fun and laughter and you dreaded the prospect of ever having to do it again?

Or perhaps your partner has several fun activities that he likes to participate in regularly and is always eager for you to attend. And for you these activities hold little fun or enjoyment – so your presence is as an unwilling participant or onlooker.

And no doubt the same applies to you. That there are some activities that provide immense fun and pleasure for you that your partner does not share – and perhaps grudgingly participates in. Never as much fun is it, as when you’re both having fun together sharing an activity or interest?

Well there is a well-researched reason for these differences. It is now understood that different people derive fun from different activities or outings. And surprisingly enough it has NOTHING to do with the activity or outing itself but rather the TYPE of activity or outing.Continue Reading

What’s the Secret to True Intimacy & Everlasting Deep Connection? Open the Path to True Love

Beautiful Couple Smiling And Facing Each Other and looking into one another's eyes

Image by photostock courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

What’s the secret to true intimacy? A loving connection and a safe, supportive environment or haven wherein you and your partner feel free and encourage one another to be your true selves are important foundations to developing true intimacy. That may sound easy, but many relationships exist in less than safe or supportive environments.

And what if there’s been little intimacy to date….? Or being brutally honest there’s a sense of animosity between the two of you and negative communication patterns are the norm?

Is it possible to rekindle the love and deepen the connection under those circumstances and create true love and deep intimacy?Continue Reading

How Does Supporting ‘Me Time’ Strengthen & Deepen Your Relationship? Lovingly & Deliciously?

‘…the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other’  ― Dalai Lama XIV

Female exercise classTruer words were never spoken.

Relationships grow more loving and deepen when the individuals within the relationship are supported and encouraged to grow as individuals – to pursue some interests or passions outside of the relationship…

It’s been shown that relationships grow when the individuals within the relationship are supported and encouraged to grow…to become autonomous. So taking time out from the relationship… to grow and develop on a personal or individual level…is a very proactive and enlightening way to deepen and enrich your relationship.Continue Reading

The Secret to Keeping the Sexual Connection & Sizzle Alive in Your Relationship? One Word, YES!

Smiling romantic couple cuddling up to one another

Image by imagerymajestic courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

Research has shown that the average guy will stop asking for sex or initiating it after as little as 3 rejections! That after 2 or 3 rejections a man begins to question his masculinity and rather than showing his desire for sexual connection will withdraw.

And most men will not reveal that to you. It’s too painful an admission!Continue Reading

Is Your Partner Using Your Love Language? 7 Steps to Ensure Their Messages of Love are Heard

Couple walking hand in hand along the beach - spending quality time togetherI’ve written several times about there being five unique or different love languages and that if you’re not using your partner’s unique, love language then your expressions of love and commitment are potentially not being heard. The notion of there being five, unique love languages was first written about by Gary Chapman.

In Chapman’s best seller he explains that there are five distinct languages of love and that by default, naïve of this or naïve to the unique language of love of our partner, we typically express our love and commitment to our partner using our OWN language of love. And in doing so risk those messages of love not being heard.Continue Reading

Keep the Sexual Connection Alive – A Reframe to Consider YES Power & the Importance of Sex

Man kissing his sleeping wifeI hear lots of women say that the sexual connection and intimacy in their relationship has faded or that they have lost the desire…are no longer inclined to engage in physical intimacy with their significant other as they used to be. As a result initiating sexual play and intimacy is seldom something that they engage in.

Or for whatever reason the sexual play and intimacy in their relationship has become somewhat of a chore rather than the fun and engagement that it used to be.Continue Reading

How Do You Keep the Novelty & Fun Alive in Your Relationship?

Young couple doing salsa or latin american dancing togetherIn a recent post I discussed the importance of  consciously working on the relationship and like plants relationships need tendering to grow and reach their full potential. That if not cared for consciously, that lack of effort over time can create havoc on what was once a truly loving union.

Relationships need constant tendering to maintain the connection and deepen the intimacy…

… And that’s not always easy to do. So what are some things that you can do to keep the relationship alive and fresh and continually grow together?Continue Reading